All around me, changes are happening without me even realising it. Even in this last month alone, so many changes have happened - I've made decisions that have impacted on my life, I'd even dare to say that I'm growing up.

And no, this isn't just because I turned twenty.

I was walking toward the park near my house this afternoon where there used to be a whole bunch of really cool swings - with old wooden platforms and supports and whatever (for any of you Christchurchers, I mean the one sandwiched between Dalrye Place and Montclare Ave) and I found that they'd put in a new playground. I'd grown up with the old one and I went to sit on one of the new swings and it didn't feel the same - it was "kiddie safe", didn't swing half as high, didn't twist as much ra ra ra, but it had changed, and I missed the old ones. My sister and I used to climb the platform and sit on top of the swing platform - the bit where they hang from - to get photos of the sunset. It was a stunning view from there, you could see out over Avonhead and a hell of a lot more of the sky than from on the ground.

In about a month from today, it'll be the first anniversary of my opa's death. That co-incides with my moving out of home too. I still miss him a lot - he was the first relative I'd lost ever and I was close to him. He'd mellowed a lot in his later years, but he used to tell me all his war stories and I still remember one time when I was a bit younger where I stormed out of my parents' house and stormed on over to my grandad's house where he talked sense into me. He was deteriorating even when I was in Germany in 05-06 and I was so scared that I wouldn't have a chance to say goodbye to him, but he hung on until November 07. Now that I think about it, that co-incided well with exams last year.

I've made friends, lost friends (trying to regain contact with those) and loved and lost. It's made me stronger as a person, I think.

And now I know what I want to do with my life, nothing's gonna stop me. I'mma be like a steamroller, man, outta my way, outta my way!

I'm also back into creating and stuffs. Life is awesome.

PS: You should all go play Perfect World or Atlantica Online. I haven't played Atlantica Online personally because it refuses to install on my laptop, but I've seen it in action and it looks pretty damn awesome.